A recipe...

I think it's mostly a problem of people over-thinking it, but there’s a serious lack of good biscuits and gravy out there. This is how they do it down in the Bible Belt. Not for the faint of heart. Stroke-inducing cuisine, here.

Da Biscuits

2 cups self-rising flour, 1/4 cup butter or lard, 1 cup buttermilk.

Preheat oven to 500. In a mixing bowl, make coarse crumbs of the butter and flour. Add the buttermilk blending with a fork just until the dough comes together. Very sticky. Spread the dough on a lightly floured surface. Knead gently, folding the dough 8 to 10 times. Press into a circle that's pretty thick. A full inch thick is good! Cut out biscuits with a 2-inch cutter. Place the biscuits on baking sheet so that they barely touch. Bake until they look and smell amazing (roughly 10 minutes).

Da Gravy

1 lb. fresh sausage, roughly 3 tablespoons of bacon drippings, 1/4 cup regular flour, 3 cups whole milk, 1/2 teaspoon salt, 1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper.

In a large cast-iron skillet (required), brown the sausage at a medium-high heat. Keep all the fat in the pan. Add more fat... Better fat... Bacon fat. Also add the flour, salt, and pepper. Cook, stirring constantly until flour browns. Slowly add milk. Keep stirring. Bring to a boil, then simmer for one minute stirring occasionally. The gravy thickens as it cools. Pour da gravy all over dem biscuits.

This is, my girlfriend will testify, the only kind of gravy I should ever try to make.