Some of you who knew me in my first 2 years at BYU know that I had some level of weird-romantic involvement with 4 girls in a row who were all named Melissa. You'll also know I refer to them respectively as Melissa I, Melissa II, Melissa III, and Melissa IV. Melissa 1 was just cruel, while Melissas 2-4 were all crazy. While you might guess the funniest stories are about the crazy ones (and you'd mostly be right), my lamentable relationship with Melissa I produced at least one exceptionally funny moment...
On our first date (which involved an ill-fated canoe launch in Utah Lake), I asked Melissa to tell me something funny about herself. She answered by telling me that it had only happened two times before in her life, but that when caught in a truly awful fit of laughter, she had honked. "You mean like a goose?!!!", I asked, to which she said, "Yeah, kinda... it's really loud and horribly embarrassing, but it's really only happened in front of family and they can only tease you so much." I had two immediate thoughts:
1. Her family was obviously nothing like mine, cause I guarantee if one of us ever honked, the others would never let them live it down. If we can tease you for it once, we'll tease you for it for the rest of your life.
2. It is now my foremost aspiration in LIFE to make this girl honk.
After a couple months of hanging out, we were alone in her living room. I can't even remember what we started laughing about, but it was one of those times when you think you're gonna die from the pain in your sides. I didn't even think about the honk, it was just really funny and I loved her normal, everyday laugh, a ton. Then out of nowhere I heard this huge rapid inhale and the loudest, most ungodly HAAAAWWWWNNNNKKKK you can possibly imagine. It caught me so off guard I immediately snorted super loud. Then she honked again and I snorted again. Honk, snort, honk snort, like a goose and a pig getting jiggy with each other.
We were already in pain, but this brought on another 15 minutes at least of uncontrollable, rolling-on-the-floor laughter. When we finally calmed to silence and tears of joyous pain, she just pounced on me and we made out on her floor for like an hour... which was awesome. Sometimes still, when I get in an uncontrollable spell of laughter with someone, I'll hear the honk like a ghost sound effect in my brain and nearly pee myself all over again.
4 comments:
This story is never not funny.
I am crying...I laughed so hard!
i loved reading this
That made me laugh so hard! But I didn't honk. That was a relief.
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